TOXIC FAMILIES, TRAUMA AND REJECTION

The battles we face are not of a physical nature, but spiritual, against unseen forces and powers. Our enemies are not human, but the demonic strongholds and patterns that God wants us to break off our bloodline. Understanding the reasons behind their behaviour doesn’t change the reality of the challenges we face as a result. There are roots that the enemy wants you to hold on to so that you perpetuate the same trauma that you have faced to other people and to the people who will be birthed through you.

But the cycles of toxicity and trauma will end with you!

The Root of Rejection

When you have a toxic family, their actions and words towards you often breed a root of rejection.

You may often ask yourself, why don’t they love me? Well, it is likely because they don’t love themselves. Many of your family members look at themselves in the mirror and see a face that they hate. They see a face that reminds them of their mother and father who failed them.

They look at their hands and they see the hands of the family member that hurt them and they say, “I hate my own hands.”

If you understood the level of self-hatred that some people experience and need deliverance from, you would understand why they hurt you. Sometimes the only thing people know how to do is distribute the pain. They reason, “If I can’t stop myself from hurting, maybe the second best thing is for all of us to hurt together.”

They don’t do this knowingly, but pain deferred is pain multiplied. Pain must be confronted.

If your grandfather experienced rejection but never faced it, then he likely shared that trauma with his son, your dad. Now your dad deals with the root of rejection, but at a greater degree, and if he refuses to confront it, then that root gets shared with you.

It is the enemy’s plan that generational curses and cycles continue until a bloodline is destroyed, but Jesus is a healer and a redeemer. He can remove the root of rejection and restore the years that it took away from you and your family! Someone has to be willing to stand up and confront it.

David experienced three forms of rejection. Rejection from a spiritual leader, rejection from a biological father, and rejection from his siblings. Due to the actions that he performed later in his life, we can determine that he never dealt with this rejection.

We need to intentionally bring rejection to God and properly confront it. Maybe you think that you have confronted various roots in your life, but there is a huge possibility that you have not properly dealt with it.

Make up in your mind that you will not perpetuate the cycle and instead, be the place in your bloodline where rejection’s reign comes to an end. Be the person in your family who was bold enough to seek the face of the Lord concerning this root and be willing to endure the process of refinement that is needed to eradicate it.

There is a time between when you are anointed and appointed when you must go through a period of character development. The day that you are anointed is not the day that you will be activated into your position, but the day you are anointed is a promise.

Every promise needs a process to be fulfilled because God is not in the business of giving you something that would destroy you.

For example, if you have a root of rejection that you have not dealt with, if God were to bless you the way that you want to be blessed, you would look at the people who hurt you and you would repay them with vengeance.Without a process of character development, you would receive the blessings of God and use them to reject others.

The anointing is the promise of what’s to come, but the process makes your character sustain that which He has called you to.

What is not dealt with and confronted and resolved in one generation will become the faults, failures, traumas, triggers, and pains of the next generation.

Enduring a hard process of character development is not just about what is inside of you and who you will become, it is about who is inside of you and who you will have the freedom to become.

Do not neglect God’s process in your life. When you begin to face various trials and circumstances, discern His intentions to purify you and to build your character. Instead of avoiding what is uncomfortable, endure it! Ask God to help you through it.

These are traumas that do not simply dissolve over time, they always go somewhere. If you do not allow God to deal with them, they become the raw materials for your own destruction. They become the raw materials that the devil uses to spark disease and sickness in your body. This is where we see hypertension that turns into high blood pressure and then cardiac arrest, or anger that turns into irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and then into rheumatoid arthritis.

This is why the Bible says that if you are set free, you are free indeed! He wants you free in every area of your mind which will free you in your physical heart, which will free you in your liver, in your kidneys, and in your whole body!

Through Jesus, you have access to redemption for you and your bloodline. Start right now, take some time to sit with Jesus, and begin to confront the things that have been plaguing your heart. Ask the Lord to deal with whatever it is.

You will be the one in your family where the hold and reign of rejection, grief, and betrayal end for good! The curse ends with you, so you must be the one in your family who holds fast to God and overcomes the toxicity!